Celebrating America

Today will be a stressful day for everyone, until the final word comes down about the fate of the next four years of this great country. Thus, I thought it would be fitting to provide a distraction from the blue and red glare, ever-changing percentages, and approximately twenty-four hours of unsolicited commentary.

Since this is a nation just brimming with individuals of all races and creeds, I decided to celebrate our diversity. Give a little credit to those whose praises we rarely sing.

 

So, without further ado, today I’m celebrating you:

 

People who put trash in public trash cans, but not all the way in

People who leave their shopping carts wherever they wish

People who use the word “sangwich”

Best Buy employees

Nosy neighbors

Guys who should wear belts, but don’t

People who wear phone earpieces 

Traffic cops

People who hit other people in the backs of their heads with snowballs

People who look in other people’s grocery carts 

People who write online reviews

People who hoard fast-food utensils

People who put oversized elf hats on their diminutively-statured children

People who spit and/or blow their noses on the ground

People with too many stickers on their cars 

People who fart in crowds

Telephone Customer Service Representatives who say, “Just a moment. I’ll transfer you,” but really mean, “So long, Sucka!” and hang up

People who work at the DMV

People who pronounce Gyros properly

People who use motor homes as their primary means of transportation 

People who line up for assigned seats at the airport

 

Trust me when I say that this country would not be the same without you. You’re truly part of what makes us so, er, great.

 

Now, enough stalling. Get out and vote!

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Comments

  1. I LOVE that over-sized elf hat. Not gonna lie.
    And I sometimes spit on the ground (when I’m running…I can’t help it…my saliva goes into overdrive).

    But I have not one sticker on my car.
    Hope we can still be friends tomorrow.

    XO

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  2. LOL Those people that can pronouce gyro, what’s up with them, lol.

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  3. I love it. I pronounce gyro slightly differently every time in hopes I get it right once in every 10.

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  4. Ha. They were all funny, but the standing in line for assigned seats at the airport almost made me fall of my chair.

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  5. I must say I’m guilty of hoarding fast food utensils and such, especially napkins. Being a mom on the go is so much easier with free fast food napkins to clean up those little messes or blow those little noses :)

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  6. People who love this post! (Me)

    Jackson brings me home sporks from the school lunch room. I’m starting a collection. ;)

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  7. *tear* you’re making me homesick :) And I will admit that my dad is/was a blow your nose on the ground kind of guy. GAH!!!

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